Wednesday, July 22, 2009
Where did it go to?
I recall, i refer, i read, i think, i feel, i missed and i reminisce. Flapping through the pages and old entries of yours and mine, the old chapters back in time, only to see the bubbly you in my eyes. You were carefree without reservations and you carried the sweetest smile with you all day long.
Looking at me, looking at you i could only think and miss you even more. I know people always say, a year older, a year wiser. I think it's a year older, more responsibilities befall on your shoulders. How i wish i could lessen those on your shoulders, to see you smile more and carefree is all i wanted. Haven't been updating my blog because i couldn't pen down the things i felt and the things i feel now, and the past. Celebrations, gatherings, outings, pictures, videos and all the events happening were not the stuffs i would really update on, those are just materials and passing chapters that i can remember and i can recall, or even both of us sharing the same memories. Penning down the feelings is what i own my blog for. Now, i just feel heavy, not for myself but for you sweetheart. Day by day, i see the sweetest girl with a tired soul, a spirit that lacks its life, i pray and i hope things turn well soon and i hope it turns the tide for you.
I'm tired only physically and i'm wasting my mental strength day by day on the godforsaken 2years that i have to serve. These 2 years are not gonna change me, maybe stronger but it's still wasting the precious time i could venture, explore and develop the abilities or polish my capabilities. People say they become man, i say we all grow up in a way or another in the society. They say the 2years would make us strong but i say we all grow strong even without the 2years of service. Girls do go strong and theoretically and scientifically they are stronger than men, they can endure more hardships or pain better than man but without the service. So it's contradicting my, and within me the soul is dying to unleash yet in this very place it can only be caged, forsaken and forgotten.
I'm still me, and i'm still here for you. I know you missed the past, me too and i missed the old times where we were carefree and me being the 'care - less' one that you admired, i lost the shine and i lost the touch. Things gonna get better, for you i promise. Just stay strong and focused. Life will not be a waste for you're such a gem that's so precious to me.
Being 17 again, a teenager is what everyone wanted. But fret not, we shape the life we want it to be and i believe yours is gonna be great, definitely with me around.
Love
Jovi back to the past 1:58 PM
